AlternativeHealingPlus - Improving Learning Skills

1. INTRODUCTION

Though this article is geared to children with learning disabilities, one will find tips and information that can be used for other children as well. Some children are completely independent in doing their homework. Some need a reasonable amount of help while others might need some extra help. Regardless of the reason or issue, a child who will get the support they need, would more likely do better. The therapy session in “Developing A Child’s Quality Of Life” can help children with their learning disabilities. Children with learning disabilities need stress-free learning. The more we help them in their struggles and are with them in their time of need, the more they will be able to manage. This may also help them deal more efficiently with their struggles in the future. The tools you are giving them when you are reaching out to them in their time of need is love, hope, encouragement, faith, confidence, enthusiasm, and self-esteem. All these tools are essential in helping a child grow into a grounded, capable, stable and established adult. The following is a list of some reasons a child might need help doing their homework:

The child has learning disabilities.
Children who need more attention, for instance, they like or have a need to talk a lot.
Children who have a hard time sitting still, seem unsettled or fiddle around when it’s time to do their homework.
Children who are hyperactive.
Children who simply need you by their side in order to do things.
Some children need emotional or moral support.
You need to tell or remind him more than 2 or 3 times to do his homework.
You find yourself, his teacher or others saying he’s just lazy.
(Note that some of these examples are what most people call laziness. Remember that “lazy” people also need help).

From personal experience, I have found that when I used this method below while doing homework with children, these children never failed a test. “This method has met with immediate and successful results.”

2. TIPS FOR WORKING WITH YOUR CHILD

Children need a patient parent to sit with them and help them with their homework.
Some children need to look up when they are thinking. This may happen even when the answer is down in front of them. Therefore, it is not to their advantage to tell them to look in a particular direction instead of looking up.
Children may need a text or situation explained to them more than once. If the child does not understand your explanations after 2 or 3 times, then the text or situation may need to be explained to them in a different way or from a different angle. If a context is explained to them in a different way and they still do not understand, then the parent must use patience to find a way that will help the child understand.
Children who have a hard time settling down, whether from hyperactivity, being talkative or a child simply fiddling around, should be settled. These children need help to focus on the task that is in front of them. It is important to quiet their mind by having them sit still. Tell the child to sit without moving his hands, feet, fingers and head. Be aware that you will need to firmly (but patiently) remind them a few times. Another way to increase their focus is to repeat and point to the question or problem the child needs to solve without responding to whatever they are saying.

Teaching children with learning disabilities can be compared to putting a puzzle together. When one puts together a puzzle, one might try many pieces before they find the right piece that fits. Sometimes one piece can be tried from a number of different angles but still does not fit. So too, when teaching or dealing with children, we will need to try using different words or ways to help a child to understand what we are teaching them. Some puzzles are easy, some are less easy, some are hard and some can be more challenging than the rest. Let’s embrace the challenge we have when teaching children just as we do with puzzle games. Just as we do not (or should not) scream, degrade, hit or use hurtful words to ourselves when we do not succeed, we can aim to avoid reacting in this way with our children, students, siblings and others.

3. HELPING CHILDREN GRASP THEIR LEARNING

The following section includes tips that can be used while doing homework with one’s children. The idea in the spelling section can also be used for easy mathematics (one digit numbers), subjects that is needed to know by heart, questions and answer sheets, the א–ב, the alphabet and words that children are starting to learn.

a. Spelling

After each word or example, remember to use in a loving, warm tone of voice “Good” (job) or “Great” (job). Here are some tips to help children study for a spelling test:

Start from the top of the list.
Continue to test the child on each word.
If there is a word that the child does not know, help him to spell it.
- Help the child as soon as you see him struggling.
- After a few attempts on a difficult word, continue to the next word on the list and come back to this particular word as mentioned below.
Go to the next word on the list.
Then, immediately go back to the word/s with which the child had difficulties.
Continue on to the next 1 or 2 words and then go back again to the words the child had difficulties.
Keep going forward 1 or 2 and then back to the difficult words.
At the end of the list, help the child with the words he had difficulty spelling.
Continue with the same method as mentioned above, forward 1 then back to the next word.

b. Mathematics

Keep your words and explanations simple if one sees that a child is not catching on. Unfamiliar words should be substituted with simpler language until the child grasps the idea that he is learning. For example, avoid using terms such as “ones”, “tens” and “hundreds” column and the idea of “carrying (or recording over to the next column”.
One could use simplified words like put instead of record or carry. These words can be added once the child gets the hang of it. For example, say to the child: “The remainder you (carry or record over to the next column) put over the number (point to the next column over the number) that is written (say the actual number). (More on this subject below).
If a child is not grasping onto an idea you are trying to explain to him, try to explain the idea in different ways until he grasps the idea.
Some children with learning disabilities forget fast. Therefore, remember to be patient when repeatedly explaining to a child.

i. Problem Solving

If a child can easily solve the problem on his own, one can and should let him manage by himself. But a child who is playing around or talking should be guided with every step, as explained below.
Guiding a child who needs help in every step and gets praised as mentioned below can build his confidence. This can also relieve some extra stress in the home.

For example, there is a math problem of 24+89:

Usually, children with learning disabilities need to see math examples vertically. That is 24 should be written on top of the 89. If this is the case, you should rewrite the example on a scrap paper for the child or have the child write it out himself. Let the child know that it is okay to rewrite the problems in a way he feels comfortable, even in school.
Point to the math problem and break the problem into steps. For instance, say in a question form:
“Four plus nine equals (4+9=)?”. After the child gives the answer, praise him by saying the words “good” or “great.”
- (When teaching a child – Show (by pointing) the child where to write down the answers and how to ‘carry’/put the 1 to the next column).
Ask the child where each particular number goes. For example, (4+9=13)
- “Where does the three go?” (the child writes down the answer). Say, “good” or “great”
- “What do we do with the one (the remainder)?” (the child writes down the answer), say, “Good job!
Then ask the child for the answer to the next column.
- “Two plus eight equals (2+8 =)?”
- Give the child a chance to answer, then point to the remainder and say, “plus the remainder, which is 1” (then praise him for his answer, “Good job”).

ii. More Tips

Some children easily get distracted. Therefore, the one guiding the child with his homework must be on the ball.

Before the child has a chance to get distracted in any way, continue straight onto the next math problem by pointing to the next problem and verbalizing it as mentioned above. If he is still unfocused, calmly continue to point to the math problem and repeat yourself. For example, the next math problem is 34+67. Say, “34+67=,” point to the problem and say, “4+7=,” (the child will say and write down the answer) you will say, “Great, next.” Then continue.
Some children use this as a game or to get attention when the parent says each example out loud. Children love it and it makes them happy. The parent should embrace the joy it gives to the child and continue on with this method.

c. Reading And Comprehension

i. For Young Children

When children are learning to read words, it is advisable to stick in a few words that they will enjoy reading. For example, names of people they like or things they enjoy doing. The joy of experiencing these words can give them extra encouragement and a love for learning. (An English word can be spelled in Hebrew letters for children that are learning the א“ב).

ii. Reading Comprehension

When we read stories to children and ask them if they understand, they may answer that they do. However, the question may be too broad to accurately determine whether they truly understand. Instead, they should be asked detailed questions about what was read to them.
Young children and children with learning disabilities should be asked questions about what was read after approximately every paragraph (depending on the length of the paragraph and the need of the child).
Asking questions can help children to learn how to look for details and comprehend what is being read to them or what they are reading.
Ask detailed questions to help children express what they feel about the story.
Asking questions like how, how much, what, when, where and why, can encourage a child to think in a more focused way. Questions need to be specific and clear, not too broad or vague. Instead of asking a child what happened in the story, you may ask, for example, “How did the girl get to school?” Then if the child needs more help, you could give him hints by asking, “Did she walk to school?” “Did she run?” “Did she go by bus?”? Or you could ask, “Was the girl happy or sad?” “Why was she happy or sad?” or “What made the girl feel happy or sad?”
Grant children the opportunity to ask questions and always say, “That was a great question” and then answer the question. If you don’t know the answer, you can say, “That is a great question, we can ask someone who would know” or you can say, “We can look it up.” It is important to work with children according to their abilities. A child that you know has a weakness or hardship in a particular area it is important to work with them as a team. Then gradually bringing them towards independence by guiding them while standing by their side as needed. Telling a child that they did a great job, can definitely encourage them to feel more confidence and become more independent.
Some children may not understand the content of a story until they hear the end of the story. Therefore when doing homework with children that have this issue, it may be worthwhile to explain to the child the whole story in short or the end part of the story. Children with this issue, who are independent readers, can be advised to read the end of the story first.
Dates and years can be confusing to some children. A parent reading to a child with this issue should eliminate these facts from the story until the child completely understands the main part of the story.
When speaking about years, it may be helpful to inform the child how many years ago you are talking about.

iii. Good To Know

Every question is a great question though we may not understand the child’s point of view.
Some children are deep thinkers and need to hear details to which others do not pay attention.
When children ask unusual questions, try to figure out where they are coming from and what prompted the question, rather than dismissing it as irrelevant.
A child who is not understanding a story being read to him, might be distracted by some information he missed. He therefore may find it difficult to concentrate on the rest of the story.
As mentioned above, some children have a need to look up when they are thinking. This happens even when the answer may be down in front of them. Therefore, it is not to their advantage to tell them to look in the book that is in front of them instead of looking up.
One should not go overboard with praising children by making a big deal about it to the child or to others. Simply say in a loving and warm tone of voice, “great job, Good job, you did a great job, I’m (so) proud of you, etc, without elaborating or discussing it more.
In order for a child to better understand what they are reading, they need to be taught how to use the commas and periods at the right places. Therefore, a child who is having difficulties in this area should receive assistance to enhance his understanding of the material.

iv. Finding The Right Reading Material For Your Child

Most people and especially those with learning disabilities, will often limit their reading to subjects that interest them. Children who seem to never or barely read might be prompted to read more once the right books of interest are presented to them. Some examples of how to find what would interest a child;

By paying attention to a child’s day to day general conversation.
His area of interest when reading him a story.
Simply by his personality.

Here are some more examples;

Do you notice your child has a particular subject matter he gravitates towards?
- Once you figure out your child’s particular interest, you can borrow simple books out of the library on this topic. Since your goal is to help the child develop the joy of reading and learning, the complexity of the material is unimportant. In this particular circumstance the goal is not the level of reading but to help the child have the tools to enable him to succeed in life. Though being challenged at the right level is very important, a child who is failing, usually means the reading material is either, too high a level for them or it is simply not their style of reading.
- When you find the right subject of interest for your child, it is advisable to provide him with easy to read books on that particular subject, so that he can absorb a lot of information in a short period of time. This can help to raise his confidence and learning level.
Is your child curious about how things work? Some children get curious on how things are made and how things work, therefore it is advisable to provide simple books in order to feed the child’s curiosity.
Does your child become emotional by sensitive stories?
If this is the case, bring home easy to read books with emotional content (the stories should not be scary). Usually emotional children gravitate to true stories. Put the books in an area that the child will see them and see if he will pick them up to read. Some children thrive on emotional stories as they use them to help them work out their own emotional world.
Does certain stories or subjects excite him? If so, provide easy comprehension books that will enable the child to continue to nourish his interest.

Notes:

When you notice that your child’s interest has changed, it is important to go with the flow and provide the reading material to satisfy his interest.
It would be beneficial to encourage children to write about the books they have read. Regardless of whether you read what the child has written, tell the child you are so proud of him and that he has done a great job. Do not correct or criticize the child in any way. This exercise is to simply give children an extra boost and encouragement. Children who have difficulties in writing essays or the like should be encouraged to write two or three sentences. Praising the child on these few sentences can give him the confidence and encouragement to eventually write more.
Topics that children are learning in school can be substituted for simpler books that can be borrowed from the library. Once the child understands what he is learning, he might be able to continue with the regular school books. In this way the child picks up the idea of what he is learning in an extremely short time.
- (Adults can also benefit from reading simpler children’s books when they want to learn something quickly. How many times do we find ourselves saying, “I wish I would have more time to learn? Instead of taking hours to read an adult book, we can fast track our learning by absorbing so much more material in a shorter, simpler form and to the point).

v. Life Examples Pertaining To This Section

A five year old boy learning in a Yeshiva could not grasp the letters of the Alef-Bais (Hebrew Alphabet). His Rebbe (teacher) complained that this child was not grasping the letters and would ask funny questions like, “What are these letters and what do they mean?” The parents of this little boy decided to take him to a Tzaddik (a Jewish religious righteous person who does the will of G-d). The Tzaddik told them that this boy was not grasping the Alef-Bais because he needs to see the effect of the letters. The Tzaddik then suggested to the parents to hire a private tutor who would teach the boy by skipping the letters and going straight into teaching him how to read words. As soon as this child started learning words instead of just the letters, he picked up on how to read very quickly. (Note that although this way of teaching is not recommended for most students, it demonstrates how important it is for some children to see the whole picture before being able to learn the details. As soon as such children understand the whole picture, they are more likely to be able to grasp what they are learning). This can be compared to a person doing a puzzle or building a house. In both cases, a person needs to see and understand their goal and the whole picture before seeing the details. [In parshas Teruma (Chumash Shemos, in Exodus) it includes the story about Moshe not understanding how to build the Menorah and asked a few times, ultimately Hashem had to show him a picture of how it would look like and then he understood. So even Moshe Rabbeinu needed to see the whole picture to help him visualize and then understand how to build]
In a particular home I once visited, it was impressive to see maps and educational charts on the wall, in the eating area, as well as placemats with educational information. Charts and placemats like a world map, area maps, telling time, mathematics, and learning about money can be very beneficial to have. In a Jewish home, a map of Eretz Yisroel, charts of the Bais Hamikdash, the order of the Hebrew month and other Jewish educational information can also be beneficial.
One mother once wondered why her child who loved to read was making so many spelling mistakes. She figured out that when her child reads, she was not really looking at the words. Thus, the mother instead had the child read her the stories out loud to her and soon after this, the problem resolved.

vi. Final Points To Note

Many children are diagnosed as “learning disabled” when often they are simply seeing things from a different angle. If such children were taught from their own, unique perspective, they would be able to grasp material much faster. and may even possibly shed their diagnosis of learning disabled.
Interestingly many children who are diagnosed with learning disabilities become very successful adults. One reason for this is that when they grow up, unconsciously they are able to see and understand their own unique perspective and thus take control of their learning skills in a way that helps them best.

4. DO’S AND DON’TS

Never belittle your child for not knowing or understanding his studies.
Do not say, “I knew you can do it, you are just lazy.” (This is a back-handed compliment and may end up causing more damage than good).
Do not call your child names or curse.
Never compare two children (every child is unique in his own special way although many times we might not see it).
Never tell a child he can do better. This will make them feel they are not doing a great job and it can definitely discourage them to try harder. Even though they might try harder, they very often will lose the true love for learning.
Praise the child in the things he is good at but do not use it as a tool to bring down your child academically or in any other way.
Always tell them that they are doing a great job and that you are so proud of them. This will motivate them.

5. AWARENESS

Realize that it is in a parent’s hands to help their child succeed.
Remember that any learning difficulties are not the child’s fault.
It is not because he does not try hard enough.
It is not because he does not pay attention.
It is not because he wants to get back at you for any reason.
It is not because he is not listening.
It is not because he does not care.
It is not because he is careless.
It is not because he is stupid.
it is not because he is lazy.

Table Of Content

Introduction
Tips For Working With Your Child
Helping Children Grasp Their Learning
1. Spelling
2. Mathematics
  1. Problem Solving
  2. More Tips
3. Reading And Comprehension
  1. For Young Children
  2. Reading Comprehension
  3. Good To Know
  4. Finding The Right Reading Material For Your Child
  5. Life Examples Pertaining To This Article
  6. Final Points To Note
Do’s And Don’ts
Awareness

Parenting And Education

Improving Learning Skills